What is a Family?

Has anyone ever stopped to ask the basic question of what a family is? I'm really not sure. It seems like such a basic and common sense concept of a husband, a wife, and children. I mean, everything in the natural order points to this reality even if you don't believe God instituted it a certain way. A male and a female equal little ones. In more cases than not the male and female (whatever species) experience a natural bonding that draws them together. This bonding (or relationship) can be ignored, but I believe it is fair to say that it is beneficial in cases where it is embraced.

For much of recent history it has been acknowledged and promoted as a good thing to have a mother and father together establishing a family. But it seems that as the trend of moral decay continues, simultaneously does acceptance of things such as sodomy and unnaturally ordered relationships.

We have missed the boat for protecting marriage and family life dependent on it. No, two men raising a child can't offer it the same as a mother and father, but (apart from a distorted understanding of sexuality) whether two men could offer a child more than one woman or one man is a point to be contested. You see marriage has been misunderstood for quite a while based on the strong 50% divorce rate. Gay marriage and adoption were only logical next steps in the disintegration of the family.

So perhaps secular society will completely forget what family is at some point. I mean, what is to stop a man from marrying a robot made to look like a female or a man? I know I have discussed in past posts how contraception is destroying lives (which it is) but I believe the deterioration of the family goes back even further than contraception. I believe the responsibility for this phenomenon rests mostly on the shoulders of Men. Yes, a point could probably be made to point the finger at women too, but men need to be men and stop pointing the finger. Adam should have stood up as the head of his marriage and told Eve to obey the Lord, but instead he just went along with his wife. How many men fail to be good leaders in their families simply out of laziness? How many women would change their minds about having abortions if men really stood up and said they wanted to support their wife and child? How many women would cease to have sex outside of marriage if men stopped using them as objects? Men now-a-days have forgotten their dignity as good strong leaders. We have gone overboard one way or another. Either men become controlling and abusive, or they become woosie push-overs, or they become gay. And men have stopped learning to become men because our fathers have abandoned us.

At this point, half of an entire generation does not know what a real father is or what a real man is. A real man will help his wife to be the best version of herself and gives of his own time and concerns for his family. And in the end, what better could a young naive child ask for than a real father and a real mother who are completely and permanently committed to each other and them for life?!

It is really amazing how beautiful and amazing a real family is. Each person compliments the others, and the relationships formed in genuine love seem to bless others by rippling through the lives of those yet unborn for generations to come.

Marriage is beyond being saved now. It needs to be rebuilt.

"Remember the law of my servant Moses, the statutes and ordinances that I commanded him at Horeb for all Israel. Behold, I will send you Eli'jah the prophet before the great and terrible day of the LORD comes. And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the land with a curse." (Mal. 4:4-6)

For some good resources on family, marriage, and fatherhood, please visit the sites listed below:
Marriage - Unique for a Reason
For Your Marriage
Family Life Center International

Tell Me I'm Right

I think one of the hardest lessons any person has to learn growing up is how to take correction. It can be really difficult. And there is something within us that resists being corrected, told what to do, or told that we are wrong. Our fallen nature doesn't want to do the one thing that it must do to be redeemed -- admit that it is fallen. Before a sick person can be healed, they need to acknowledge that they are sick. Well, part of our sickness is not being able to acknowledge that we are sick.

I would dare to propose that many people in our modern culture either avoided correction most of their lives or never learned to accept correction. It seems that sin has become so rampant in our society partly because of people being unwilling to accept that their sinful tendencies or actions are not good. Let's take pornography as an example. This has historically been looked down upon in this country as taboo. And I would venture to say that most people's consciences tell them it is wrong. But when you ignore your conscience for long enough, your conscience dies. And when you no longer think you are doing something wrong, then you can't stand when someone (those with alive and well formed consciences) tells you you are doing something wrong. So, over time the collective conscience of a secular society only degrades without anything to lead it back to the truth. And as things in a degraded society start to look in favor of your sinful behavior, then it is all the more affirming to have someone in authority tell you that what you are doing is okay. This is how sinful behavior becomes permissible by civil law. When mom tells you to stop something, you go to dad. It is typical.

We want to be told that what we are doing is okay. We want affirmation of our behavior. I would dare again to say that this is exactly the issue that people living a gay lifestyle are struggling with. Their consciences may be telling them they are wrong and they want someone to tell them otherwise, or maybe their consciences are dead and they are tired of history telling them they are wrong in wanting to be married. Dana Mack gave a good perspective on this idea of homosexuals trying to win affirmation using the age old institution of marriage in Friday's Wall Street Journal.

"For those same-sex couples in California and elsewhere who are striving for deeper affirmation of their sexual partnerships, Judge Walker's decision —while hardly the final judicial word on the subject—is balm. Gay couples have moved closer to sewing lives in patterns borrowed from their own birth families' cultural histories and traditions. The question, however, is whether giving them license to piece together remnants of so decayed an institution as marriage will not aggravate all the more the fraying of its fabric." (Wall Street Journal)

I think Dana's reflection is very insightful. In trying to make marriage something that it is not for the sake of their own feelings, gay activists will wind up destroying marriage. A virtuous vocation is no longer a virtuous vocation when you redefine it with vice. Yet true marriage as Dana also discusses will always be defined by being "principally an arrangement for bearing children" not by being "primarily a romantic, or even an economic, bond." The divinely ordained institution of marriage can't be changed by any court or law but only by the one that instituted it. And He doesn't change.

The truth is, that no matter how hard we try, we can NEVER get true affirmation of our sins. God loves us too much.

Adam and Steve?

"And this is the judgment, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil." (John 3:19)

The days grow dark and weary, but take heart and rejoice! For yes, the light has come into the world!

Well brothers and sisters. If there has ever been an hour or a time where one must stand and say NO MORE. This is it. If the murder of countless millions of children in the womb has not shaken you to get out of your lazy-boy then this should. For the day is at hand when the very fabric (or what remains of it) of our society is coming to trial. The Prince of Darkness has been working tirelessly long hours, day upon day, year upon year, for this moment.

If you have not heard, Proposal 8 in California defining marriage as between one man and one woman has been struck down by a judicial activist. You see, even our judges have lost an understanding of truth. Well, if our degrading secularistic increasingly liberal culture gets its way, "Pro-Marriage" will become a common phrase. Not for liberals, but for those who really understand what God ordained marriage to be.

Don't brush this off, because I'm telling you now, that gay activists are licking their lips at the opportunity to finally take this debate to the highest court of the land. And they will. And what do you think that court would rule if they had no constraints? Well, lets see. If they can redefine the value of life why can't they redefine marriage? Do you get what I'm saying? We are soon to have a battle on our hands the likes of which has not been seen in any of our lifetimes. A battle for the very institution that has defined western civilization as we know it. A battle for the meaning of marriage.

Don't think that this battle will just be handed to us. No, now it is time to fight. To fight with all we got. To fight with ideas. To fight with the "sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." (Eph. 6:17) And most of all to fight with prayer! Yes, we can win. Yes, we can, because Christ reigns victorious over sin and death.

If marriage is redefined in this country then children will grow up confused and soon generations will not have any reason to get married at all. Then children will be diagnosed with more behavioral problems and will be seen as a commodity to be bought and sold; people will vote in more liberal politicians and laws; crime will rise; and finally when there is no difference between anyone, all self-worth, dignity and innocence will be lost. Eventually we will forget completely who we are. Just like we have forgotten the original beauty of Eden.

Now is the time. Now is our day. We must spend ourselves for that which is good, for that which is true, for that which is holy. Tell all your friends. Tell all your family. Tell everyone you know. For if we lose this, it will not stop here. The licentiousness will continue until society is no more.

What can I do?  First, visit The Manhattan Declaration website to read and sign the declaration. Then read up on the issue. And talk about what you know is right. If you are afraid of offending others then we will lose. Every good team requires a strong offense.

Lastly, keep Hope. Because the light has come into the world.